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What I Never Had Seen

by Nicolas Peter

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1.
Kid 00:54
did you drive all the way up here just to sit around and drink beer at your brother's apartment where nobody lives I gotta say I'm disappointed in you kid
2.
I didn't wanna talk about animals or our future I didn't wanna think about the tennessee valley authority then you came in talking bout the three dogs on your shoulder I didn't need to talk about the birthmark inside of my knee cause you wouldn't know about that would you wanna know about that? well the tide rolls in and the tide rolls out and I thought we were running out of things to talk about but your ears are long and my hair is red there's cigarettes there's birth control in the watershed enough blood and curd to fill a gallon drum no strong handed man staring down a loaded gun when I find myself content I know it won't last long soon I'll be back to thinking that everything is wrong in my life in the world I'm nothing but terrified jesus christ out in space they're watching from satellites there's a dam in the river where the tributaries met but this is all dumb forget what I said
3.
I saw witches reading woolf digging holes out in the garden they tied bells around their shoes singing songs I had forgotten they said "if you ever turn around we'll be sure to not be found" they tied my arms behind my back they're laying tile down in the basement black & white red smeared like paint behind their masks they hid their faces they said "if you ever make a sound we'll be sure to lay you down" I saw the moon hang in the blinds casting light cross his apartment when I woke I'd thought I'd died I heard a voice it whispered softly it said "learn to swim or else you'll drown; spring surely floods this town" some bratty carnal thing that I needed for comfort healing I fell in love with a cobweb again
4.
Soap 02:12
I can't get you off you're like soap on my skin and the ropes they're taut the knots will not come undone again just in case the sprawl collides get in the car you're gonna learn to drive this weather doesn't feel like october it feels like march and I'm lying naked in the yard
5.
Six Flags 02:11
are you in love with anyone? it doesn't have to be me I need to know to stare them down I need to know I need I need when I drove you home I thought "it's alright" "we must have lost them on their bikes" "I'll guard the door I'll stay up all night" they filled the rivers up with birth control the fish were drowning in their organs you told me you wished you were born a girl I need to know I need I need well they broke our windows with baseball bats combat boots, michael myers masks "thou shall not" written cross their backs jesus christ I don't feel right cross myself I'd be just fine if the briars weren't so tight if the buses ran all night jesus christ I don't feel right
6.
Briars 03:50
there's a briar round my forearm and it cuts like broken glass thousand things I wanna tell you a thousand things I just can't ask books on dharma and the boys we like UFOs those sounds at night drawing stars across the map now ink bright red stains my skin baphomet scrawled on your shower curtain you wear to god you worship him books on dharma and the boys we like UFOs those sounds at night pretty sure this isn't normal pretty sure this won't pass cause there's a briar round my forearm and it cuts like broken glass

about

Six songs about UFOs, motorcycles, and feelings you wish would just go away.

Recorded in my bedroom in Boone and my parents' in Apex in December 2016.

Album art by Reece Rose

credits

released January 1, 2017

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about

Nicolas Peter Vilas, North Carolina

Ecclesiastes 1:9

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